A wing is a leg


earthman buck
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earthman buck
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04/05/2006 12:06 am
Here is an argument my dad and I had during supper. Soon you will see why I hate arguing with him.

It all started when I picked up a chicken wing and stretched it out.

Me: It's remarkable how much this looks like a leg.
Dad: That's because it is a leg.
Me: Actually, it's a wing.
Dad: A wing is a leg.
Me: What? How?
Dad: A wing is a leg.
Me: How the hell do you figure that?
Dad: Just look at that wing. Looks like a leg. The bone structure.
Me: (laughing) That doesn't make a wing the same as a leg.
Dad: Sure it does. A wing is just a leg at a different point in evolution.
Me: Huh?
Dad: What the chickens had long ago was four legs, then they evolved into wings [I don't know if this is actually true, but I went along with it for the sake of argument].
Me: So, wings were legs.
Dad: Yeah, wings are legs.
Me: No, they're not. They were once, but they're not anymore.
Dad: Sure they are. There's not even any argument about it.
Me: So you would refer to wings as legs?
Dad: Yes.
Me: Would you refer to chickens as four-legged creatures?
Dad: No.
Me: But they have two legs, plus two wings, which you insist are legs.
Dad: No, they were legs.
Me: You're not making any sense.
Dad: Have you ever heard of a [some dinosaur name which escapes me]?
Me: No.
Dad: It was this prehistoric fish thing. It had fins with arms on them, and because of it, scientists think all limbs are related, and are just at different evolutionary stages.
Me: Ok. So would you call a person a monkey?
Dad: I believe that's what happened, yes [referring to the theory that humans evolved from apes].
Me: But would you refer to human beings as 'monkeys.'
Dad: No, because they're not.
Me: And yet you would call a wing a leg?
Dad: Yes.
Me: That's the stupidest thing you've ever said.
Dad: What is the function of a leg?
Me: Uh...to walk....kick things.....
Dad: Is that it?
Me: Uh...to run?
Dad: And what is the function of a wing?
Me: To fly.
Dad: Ok. So wings are for flying, legs are for walking.....they both get you places. They're for transportation.
Me: So would you call a car a leg too?
Dad: A car?
Me: Yeah.
Dad: No. Can you hit stuff with a car?
*my little brother Connor and I laugh*
Me: Yes. If you want to.
[Connor reads the definition of "leg" aloud, which mentions something about them being 'the lower two appendages of the body']
Dad: Did ya hear that? Lower body.
Me: So?
Dad: Well, what you're saying isn't making sense. It's like saying that because a nose is on the face, and a mouth is on the face, a mouth is a nose.
Me: Is a mouth a nose?
Dad: Of course not!
Me: Is a wing a leg?
Dad: At another point in evolution, yes.
Me: Well there you go! At another point in evolution! A wing was a leg. As of right now, a wing is not a leg.
Dad: That's what I've been saying all along!
Me: (shaking head and laughing, albeit frustrated laughter) No! It's not! You said a wing is a leg! As in, right now!
Connor: That's true, you did.
Dad: No. You're all mixed up. That's why I hate arguing with you boys. You can never listen to both sides of the argument. *walks away*

And there you have it. He always leaves at just the right time, right before I stab him in the heart. Another good one was the argument we had about the existence of the universe. It encompassed four consecutive nights. It ended with him stating that I was narrow-minded because I wouldn't accept the fact that things are exactly the way he thinks them to be.

So is it just me, or was there something horribly flawed with his argument? It seems to me like he kept contradicting himself, but I don't know. What do you guys think?
# 1
Tonja_Renee
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Tonja_Renee
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04/05/2006 12:19 am
Ok - Earthman..

Here is how I see it.. Your family smokes too much drugs...

The conversations that you have with your family have to be drug induced.. if not... you have big problems... :)
Great works are performed, not by strength, but by perseverance.
# 2
Julian Vickers
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Julian Vickers
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04/05/2006 12:25 am
Yeah I was having a conversation with my friend the other day who actually thought Macbeth was a woman.
Miracle Blade 4: Gibs on touch.
# 3
iiholly
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iiholly
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04/05/2006 12:31 am
I want to do the bango with your dad.

# 4
alucard0941
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alucard0941
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04/05/2006 2:34 am
I bet your wings got cold during dinner.

At least your dad doesnt get pissed off when you argue with him.
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# 5
Jolly McJollyson
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Jolly McJollyson
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04/05/2006 2:35 am
Originally Posted by: Julian VickersYeah I was having a conversation with my friend the other day who actually thought Macbeth was a woman.

Well, there is Lady Macbeth...
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I want the P-funk!

My band is better than yours...
# 6
Cryptic Excretions
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Cryptic Excretions
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04/05/2006 4:09 am
It's all meat to me. Meat = yummy.
The Gods Made Heavy Metal, And They Saw That It Was Good
They Said To Play It Louder Than Hell, We Promised That We Would

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Whatever you do, don't eat limes. A friend of mine ate a lime once and BAM!! Two years later. Herpes.
# 7
jiujitsu_jesus
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jiujitsu_jesus
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04/05/2006 4:51 am
That's spooky - your Dad argues in exactly the same way as my Dad! *shudder*

Except my Dad has the added complication of being hearing impaired, so he often misunderstands what you're saying to him.
"It's all folk music... I ain't never heard no horse sing!"
- Attributed variously to Leadbelly and Louis Armstrong

If at first you don't succeed, you are obviously not Chuck Norris.

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# 8
jiujitsu_jesus
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jiujitsu_jesus
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04/05/2006 4:52 am
Originally Posted by: Cryptic ExcretionsIt's all meat to me. Meat = yummy.


*bites off Cryptic's ear* I agree.
"It's all folk music... I ain't never heard no horse sing!"
- Attributed variously to Leadbelly and Louis Armstrong

If at first you don't succeed, you are obviously not Chuck Norris.

l337iZmz r@wk o.K!!!??>
# 9
Hammurabi
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Hammurabi
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04/05/2006 5:30 am
Your dad sucks at debate.
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# 10
CW14
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CW14
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04/05/2006 12:31 pm
Originally Posted by: Cryptic ExcretionsIt's all meat to me. Meat = yummy.


BOL
# 11
earthman buck
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earthman buck
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04/05/2006 4:22 pm
Originally Posted by: HammurabiYour dad sucks at debate.

Thank you! Finally, someone agrees with me!
# 12
alucard0941
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alucard0941
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04/05/2006 10:51 pm
what if like in 50 years from now, scientists found out that legs and wings were the same... :confused:
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# 13
z0s0_jp
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z0s0_jp
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04/05/2006 11:04 pm

"Dammit Jim!! I'm a guitarist not a roadie...so haul my gear"
# 14
jiujitsu_jesus
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jiujitsu_jesus
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04/06/2006 12:43 am
That there in the diagram is an arm, not a leg.

Burn on Earthman's Dad! :p
"It's all folk music... I ain't never heard no horse sing!"
- Attributed variously to Leadbelly and Louis Armstrong

If at first you don't succeed, you are obviously not Chuck Norris.

l337iZmz r@wk o.K!!!??>
# 15
Dr_simon
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Dr_simon
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04/06/2006 12:53 am
try googeling "pentadactile limb" or "radial evolution" (no pun intended)
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# 16
ericthecableguy
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ericthecableguy
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04/06/2006 12:59 am
Originally Posted by: Julian VickersYeah I was having a conversation with my friend the other day who actually thought Macbeth was a woman.


"Thou art mad to say it!" (i, iv, 32).

Macbeth was a pimp. Just kill em all and let God sort em out says he.
For life is quite absurd and death's the final word, You must always face the curtain with a bow
Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin
Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow.

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# 17
Andrew Sa
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Andrew Sa
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04/06/2006 4:28 pm
Originally Posted by: PonyOnewing or leg... it's MURDER :mad: Poor chicken. :(



If we werent meant to eat them, they wouldnt taste so good...
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# 18
PRSplaya
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PRSplaya
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04/06/2006 5:22 pm
I'm fixing to go have some chicken for lunch.... yummy!
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# 19
Cryptic Excretions
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Cryptic Excretions
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04/06/2006 5:30 pm
Originally Posted by: PRSplayaI'm fixing to go have some chicken for lunch.... yummy!

I just had a ham and turkey sandwich for lunch. I wish it was more filling though, as I'm still hungry.
The Gods Made Heavy Metal, And They Saw That It Was Good
They Said To Play It Louder Than Hell, We Promised That We Would

Hulk Smash!!

Whatever you do, don't eat limes. A friend of mine ate a lime once and BAM!! Two years later. Herpes.
# 20

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