Originally posted by iiholly
I have an imaginary friend...

I used to have several, they were introduced to me by an imaginary friend. The imaginary bit in this case was the friend bit, sadly the person existed. Many long letters later this real imaginery friend started going out with my sister who wanted kids. The imaginary friends he'd introduced me to seemed more and more spurious all the time, there was no consistency to their characters, whatsmore how could a guy who lives in a vicarage in a little village possibly know so many guitarists who could kick MY ass? I wrote a poem about it. I'd heard so much about her, really liked what I thought I knew of her, I wanted to meet her. That couldn't have happened because SHE WAS FICTITIOUS. My real imaginary friend was worried that the disclosure of his duplicitous double-dealings and the hours I'd spent writing to people who didn't exist might make me resent his going out with my sister and try and split them so he 'killed' her with a drug overdose. I wrote to her imaginary brother and sister commiserating them on her death and saying I'd nearly lost my own sister the same way and I know how hard it must be. My real but imaginary friend continued to go out with my sister long after this revelation had been unearthed. A better advert for contraception I have never met than that guy. There's no such thing as a human gyroscope, nobody can remain upstanding after so much spin.

The Irony?

None of you will know if this is true because it's on the web!