Bullying

I attended a town hall meeting in my area today about bullying in the schools and what to do about it.
I was kinda blown away by the total apathetic response they gave... basically saying that bullying wasn't a big problem and students could always inform teachers if there was a problem.

Has anybody here been a victim of school bullying?
If so, how did it affect your performance at school?

Originally Posted by: schmangeI attended a town hall meeting in my area today about bullying in the schools and what to do about it.
I was kinda blown away by the total apathetic response they gave... basically saying that bullying wasn't a big problem and students could always inform teachers if there was a problem.

Has anybody here been a victim of school bullying?
If so, how did it affect your performance at school?

It makes you feel like s**t as a kid. I don't think it helps to just inform a teacher since the teacher ain't always going to be there for the kid. Somehow you just gotta get the courage up to punch that POS bully square in the eye. Then you'll feel better and he'll leave you alone. ;)

Sadly, that's pretty much what it came down to for me...

I moved to this town in 1988 as an eight year old. I'd been in a lot of schools and never really had any problems, then I got here and 90% of the students I was dumped in with recognized me as alone, shy and an easy target.

Long story short, the Principal was a pansy and most of my teachers were totally indifferent, so after a couple of years of telling my teachers what was going on and seeing nothing happen and then going to the Principal and being told "well, So-and-So comes from a broken home, I can't do anything that would degrade his self esteem" I decided that I'd had enough.

Within a span of two or three weeks, I sent two kids who's been bullying me and were a lot bigger than me home crying and that was the end of that.

Of course, I got my ass reemed by the Principal (who knew damn well what happened and why) but my sixth grade teacher (who's one of the best I've ever had, by the way) backed me up and so I think at the worst, I ended up with a short in-school suspension.

Ya, I've never been able to bully anyone. My sister was bullied alot and she'd cry every night about it. It really pissed me off, but what can you do? Long story short most kids are jerk-offs and always will be.

Meh, I got bullied and bullied others. BS that students can go to teachers, though. I'd never have told a teacher on someone, and if someone had told the teacher on me, I would have been one angry third grader.

It worries me that back then it was a little scuffle, maybe a black eye. Today these kids take knives and guns to school when they are pushed too far. That is what worries me most. :(

Originally Posted by: magicninjaIt worries me that back then it was a little scuffle, maybe a black eye. Today these kids take knives and guns to school when they are pushed too far. That is what worries me most. :(

Yeah, true. It's at the point where some teachers are afraid of their students. Old woman opinion alert:

I think it's all this gangsta rap. Hell, I even wrote a song about it (see rapbot 3000).

I wish we could blame it on a specific source. Truth be told we could, it is the PARENTS!!!

Originally Posted by: schmangeI attended a town hall meeting in my area today about bullying in the schools and what to do about it.
I was kinda blown away by the total apathetic response they gave... basically saying that bullying wasn't a big problem and students could always inform teachers if there was a problem.

Has anybody here been a victim of school bullying?
If so, how did it affect your performance at school?

Having come from the school I went through, bullying was popular enough that they might as well have made it part of the curriculum. Seriously, there wasn't anyone that didn't bad mouth anyone there. So, naturally, not fitting in with any of the cliques, I pretty much caught **** from everyone. And since the teachers weren't any better than the students (they were often notorious for humiliating select students while favoring others) there wasn't really anyone to turn to in a time of crisis. So how do the teachers expect a student in need to come to them when they're making fun of the kids as well? As for how it effected my performance... well... who wants to go to a place they hate because of who they're around? It'd be easier to work without having to deal with people. Maybe if the teachers gave us our own classrooms or something.

Originally Posted by: magicninjaI wish we could blame it on a specific source. Truth be told we could, it is the PARENTS!!!

Yeah... we need fewer parents in the world.

Telling the teacher, in most cases, doesn't do a whole lot. If you tell the teacher that some kid bullied you, then the teacher could give the kid detention. Then that kid goes home and tells his parents that the teacher was mean to him. Then the parent is on the teachers ass for putting their kid in detention.

It's how the world works. Gotta deal.

Originally Posted by: Tele MasterThen that kid goes home and tells his parents that the teacher was mean to him. Then the parent is on the teachers ass for putting their kid in detention.

In most cases I'm familiar with, the parent doesn't even enough to do that.

Originally Posted by: Jolly McJollyson
I think it's all this gangsta rap.

My thoughts exactly.

I only bully that do drugs. Most of it goes over their heads though. Atleast, the first few weeks it has.
I don't know the only people i've been bullied by is my old friends. I guess that's the difference between girls and guys.
What exactly is a good definition for bullying?

Originally Posted by: iihollyI only bully that do drugs. Most of it goes over their heads though. Atleast, the first few weeks it has.
I don't know the only people i've been bullied by is my old friends. I guess that's the difference between girls and guys.
What exactly is a good definition for bullying?

Unjust verbal and/or physical abuse towards another with the intent of lowering someone's self esteem.

Originally Posted by: iihollyI only bully that do drugs. Most of it goes over their heads though. Atleast, the first few weeks it has.
I don't know the only people i've been bullied by is my old friends. I guess that's the difference between girls and guys.
What exactly is a good definition for bullying?

I joke with my friends all the time, we tell each other to f***k off and the sort. But that's all in good fun. A bully is someone who is not your friend and you hardley know the guy but yet he wants to get in your face, talk smack, push you around, take your lunch money, you get the idea.

Originally Posted by: PonyOneat first my parents basically told me that i should be the better person, no matter what... like jesus... tell the bully he's being mean, that i wanted to be his friend, that there was no reason for him to be mean to me, and it was stupid... and he'd feel stupid, he'd look at himself and be like "oh man he's right" and apologize.

well that was how it was supposed to work. i guess 7 year olds don't internalize that much.

and of course the "recess ladies" could have given two craps what was actually happening. so my parents got sick of me coming home with bruises and told me to stick up for myself.

maybe you guys remember the rodney king riots? well i went to an almost all-black school in a black neighborhood when that happened, and so i can bet you can imagine how popular i was at that point. the really sick thing was that kids that age don't have that intrinsic hate... they went home and listened to their parents talk about how evil white people were and that they kept them from getting good jobs... they listened to their older siblings talk about how they needed to give white people a taste of their own medicine, that it was their turn... so then my friends would come to school and we'd be out on the playground, and suddenly i found myself being beaten by five to ten people i thought were my friends. it took a few years of therapy to erase the terror reaction i got from being in crowds, and even still, if i'm at a club or something, sometimes i just need to step out for a minute and center myself.

well after i came home with my face kicked in and had to go to the hospital, they decided it was time to put me into karate. that was the end of it, for the most part, though i was no stranger to social ostracization. because of everything early on in my childhood, for a long time i found it hard to be a social person; i just didn't trust anyone or anything, you know? Being a loner makes you a hell of a target, and being a loner who was taller and bigger than most of the kids your age and was reputed to know how to fight made you an even heavier target for the natural bully kids, who had to prive how awesome they were by abusing others. i wore a lot of clothing that people thought was militant, or confrontational: camo, jeans, black t shirts, neutral color button-ups, a black trench coat... stuff that in theory makes you blend in, disappear, into the bushes and the shadows, where people will leave you the hell alone. in practice, everyone just takes note that you aren't wearing what they are (at the time, BUM Equipment, Mossimo, Stussy, Unionbay jackets... hahaha) and they pounce on you.

ultimately, somehow, i ended up being fairly popular, but i was always kind of like the "nerd avenger;" i'd jump into a fight where one of the jocks was picking on one of the nerdier kids and beat the jock up. i couldn't stand to see people beat up on people weaker than them, and i felt like i was lucky enough to be taller, stronger, and better equipped overall for defending myself than most other kids, and i guess that's sort of carried over to nowadays... i want to be a lawyer, do the adult equivilant of it.

thank god that now i'm an adult, and in the adult world where we are abusive to one another in a civil way. the really funny thing is that bullies never really change: whether they go on to be a "real man" and lift heavy stuff for low pay, or they go on to get a well paying job, they still like to try and feel around for people they think are "weaker" than them. sneer at you for not driving a BMW or wearing a Rolex, or tell you you're a homosexual because you don't drive a lardassed pickup that's lifted 8 inches and they can bench blah blah blah WHO CARES. they never do change, it's just that the rules change, and to this end, it never changes that most of them don't give me hell, because i'll still give it back to them.

Where were you when I was in high school.

Originally Posted by: PonyOneat first my parents basically told me that i should be the better person, no matter what... like jesus... tell the bully he's being mean, that i wanted to be his friend, that there was no reason for him to be mean to me, and it was stupid... and he'd feel stupid, he'd look at himself and be like "oh man he's right" and apologize.

well that was how it was supposed to work. i guess 7 year olds don't internalize that much.

and of course the "recess ladies" could have given two craps what was actually happening. so my parents got sick of me coming home with bruises and told me to stick up for myself.

maybe you guys remember the rodney king riots? well i went to an almost all-black school in a black neighborhood when that happened, and so i can bet you can imagine how popular i was at that point. the really sick thing was that kids that age don't have that intrinsic hate... they went home and listened to their parents talk about how evil white people were and that they kept them from getting good jobs... they listened to their older siblings talk about how they needed to give white people a taste of their own medicine, that it was their turn... so then my friends would come to school and we'd be out on the playground, and suddenly i found myself being beaten by five to ten people i thought were my friends. it took a few years of therapy to erase the terror reaction i got from being in crowds, and even still, if i'm at a club or something, sometimes i just need to step out for a minute and center myself.

well after i came home with my face kicked in and had to go to the hospital, they decided it was time to put me into karate. that was the end of it, for the most part, though i was no stranger to social ostracization. because of everything early on in my childhood, for a long time i found it hard to be a social person; i just didn't trust anyone or anything, you know? Being a loner makes you a hell of a target, and being a loner who was taller and bigger than most of the kids your age and was reputed to know how to fight made you an even heavier target for the natural bully kids, who had to prive how awesome they were by abusing others. i wore a lot of clothing that people thought was militant, or confrontational: camo, jeans, black t shirts, neutral color button-ups, a black trench coat... stuff that in theory makes you blend in, disappear, into the bushes and the shadows, where people will leave you the hell alone. in practice, everyone just takes note that you aren't wearing what they are (at the time, BUM Equipment, Mossimo, Stussy, Unionbay jackets... hahaha) and they pounce on you.

ultimately, somehow, i ended up being fairly popular, but i was always kind of like the "nerd avenger;" i'd jump into a fight where one of the jocks was picking on one of the nerdier kids and beat the jock up. i couldn't stand to see people beat up on people weaker than them, and i felt like i was lucky enough to be taller, stronger, and better equipped overall for defending myself than most other kids, and i guess that's sort of carried over to nowadays... i want to be a lawyer, do the adult equivilant of it.

thank god that now i'm an adult, and in the adult world where we are abusive to one another in a civil way. the really funny thing is that bullies never really change: whether they go on to be a "real man" and lift heavy stuff for low pay, or they go on to get a well paying job, they still like to try and feel around for people they think are "weaker" than them. sneer at you for not driving a BMW or wearing a Rolex, or tell you you're a homosexual because you don't drive a lardassed pickup that's lifted 8 inches and they can bench blah blah blah WHO CARES. they never do change, it's just that the rules change, and to this end, it never changes that most of them don't give me hell, because i'll still give it back to them.

Damn! Just when I think I know the half of it.
How do you live with all that hatred towards you?
Anyways, props to you for standing up for the little guy!

Originally Posted by: ericthecableguyDamn! Just when I think I know the half of it.

seriously.. pony, you've had a pretty ****ed up life, I'd say. from what I know of it... but I guess you had a sucky start on life so that this half of your life would be great.. what with asian girls and european cars and getting to work at haunted mansions.. you've got it made dude!

I come from an extremely small school where everyone is related. I wasn't related to anyone close to my age, and people thought of me as an outsider. I was a huge kid, (I weighed 150 pounds in 5th grade). I was always shy in my younger years, and my best friend was the smallest kid in my class. They saw I was big and a push over and they liked to see if they can take me down because I always tried to be nice to everyone. I had my share of fights, but they weren't that big of a deal like they are now. I came home crying everyday because everyone teased me because I was so big. I took it as good as I can, always trying to turn the other cheek, telling my principal did nothing, and my dad said there wasn't that much they can do, and I need to find a way to take care of it. Everyone kinda grew up in high school, some of my goos friends tried to beat me up all the time in elementary, I don't trust any of them however. But now we are all cool with each other, I was voted Mr. ECHS which is where they just pick a good guy that represents the school or something like that (doesn't really mean anything. But anyways bullys can be the worst thing on the world to be around. I think it is the parents fault as well, because many of the fights I got into were the kids of the guys my dad got into fights with.